I seem to apply meaning to things all the time.
I don’t mean to, but it just happens.
Just last night, a whole wall shelf came tumbling down with all it’s books, decorative things and precious knick-knacks. No I don’t blame the strong Ikea construction *smile* – but only my thoughtlessly placed collection of design and inspirational books. Thoughtless, because who in their right mind puts close to ten heavy hardcover books on one shelf. In my defence; they did look pretty with it’s bright and colourful spines.
But they didn’t stand a chance and they knew it. The books as well as a few photo frames, whose glass shield cracked in many places – all tumbled down. It’s a good thing that I didn’t have any mirrors placed up there because my span of bad luck would have continued for another millennia.
What was up there, and got hit the most, was a mama figurine that was very special.
I eyed the pretty soapstone mother and child for a while on my last vacation to the Dominican, that was now over two years ago. I finally decided to make her my souvenir and took her home. When I returned back to my family, because yes – I went without them, and went on a healing trip with my sister only. But when I returned, my curious little one-and-a-half year old then, pleaded to play with her. Silly me, I gave her the soapstone mama and a few minutes later. Clank. She fell down, and down fell her head.
A few months later, I get my diagnosis and under the knife I went (a thymectomy to be exact). Recovering, I realized this wasn’t just a broken figurine – that was a sign with a clear mark pointing to my neck. Eventually she got crazy-glued in place and a remarkable thing happened – I got better. Physically and emotionally I was feeling better. I was healing with just a scar on my neck similar to the scar on the mama figurine.
Skip ahead a year or so – to umm… yesterday. The shelf falls down, everything falls with it. And there she is again, a broken mama.
- – Is it another sign? – -
Don’t know. But I already booked a doctor’s visit to get me referrals to have all kinds of tests done for… you know it. For my abdomen, digestive issues, intestinal health – anything in *that* area on my broken mama. And who knows, maybe I’ll need a new surgery on my neck again – the signs are all there.
On a happier note, my daughter saw the broken mama and said “at least nothing happened to the baby”…….
Oh thank goodness – yes. Nothing happened to the baby, my baby!
I know I’m weird and analyze things too much…..
Do you sometimes believe in signs?
Comments
beautifully shared ella… i’m sorry about your figurine. and it reminds of the time my equally well-stocked shelf full of precious “things” came tumbling down (it was an ikea shelf too! hmmm) and i was sad at first but then a bit relieved. i don’t know… i sometimes put such a heavy sentiment on *things* that have meaning to me that ironically, if they are gone or broken, i feel like i’ve set them free from their obligation to me.
anyway… i’m not sure i believe in signs, but i do believe in intuition and serendipity. and i’m a firm believer that we sometimes know things without realizing, or without understanding why. those answers always seem to come later.
i hope you’re feeling ok, and i’m hoping that all your appointments go smoothly…
Thank you sweet Ana for you wise words ;)
Did all the lab tests today (thank goodness for sweet ohip ;D
now we’ll just see – but guess what… the anxiety is gone and I’m feeling better already!
I’m sure I wouldn’t have panicked so much if it was an elephant broken in pieces – or maybe? ; o
xo
I do believe in signs! I think there are signs everywhere, but we are not always open to see them. I also think sometimes we see things that are not really there… (once in a while, that does happen). So I hope this is the case. I hope all your test will come back fine and that you’ll be able to continue on your journey to heal without having any set backs. But I’m a lot like you in that way, so I understand wanting to book appointments just to be on the safe side.
Maybe you should glue your mama back together asap, and then it will be like nothing happened ;)
*Hugs*
Stephanie
Thanks Stephanie! ;D
I’m sure my mind is playing tricks on me – but the crazy glue is ready to go ;D
xo
I don’t believe in signs but I do believe in karma though. You reap what you sew (sow?), get what you give, what goes around come around. I do have a couple things that mean alot to me too. However those things are now well out of reach from our daughter. I remember one day she broke something that supposedly had “significance” to me. I am amazed at how quickly told myself “Ashley it was just an item and she didn’t mean to break it. There are more important things/people to worry about breaking than that item”. Now I cannot for the life of me remember what she broke. Apparently it wasn’t as important as I thought it was. I do remember her throwing one of my diamond earrings her Dada got me down the drain though. :O)
Oh yes, I do believe in signs. This is such a lovely post, Ella, and your sweet little baby girl’s reasoning is so refreshing and adorable. I’m wishing you good health and a reasuring doctor’s visit!!!
Shame about your mama figurine. Time for more super glue…or another trip to the Dominican! xo
Deb, I’m all smiles here from your comment!
Yes baby – the sign is that I need another vacation and just get a brand spankin new mama! I’m sure I’d come back feeling brand new as well ;D
Thanks so much for shining a happier light on this so called *sign*
HUGS!
Oh goodness! I am such a believer in signs. This was a beautiful post. Many wishes for good health to you. :)
oh my gosh, the wisdom of a child! She is wise beyond her years. As for you, broken mama, I don’t live with an illness, so I don’t know what it’s like, but my advice would be to take it one day at a time. Don’t get too ahead of yourself. Slow and steady…